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The Chronicles of Spam

  • Sherwood Forest Paintball 3497 U.S. 35 La Porte, IN, 46350 United States (map)

May 5th & 6th, 2018

The Sherwood Classic - "The Chronicles of Spam"  paintball Scenario brought to you by:

Grimm City Sports

Early bird registration: $55* per player by 3/31/18

Pre Registration: $65* per player by 04/21/18

Walk-on admission: $75* per player

*note: unlimited air fills are included in your registration cost

A case of paint purchased on or before 4/21/18 is $55 for G.I. 3 star or Valken Graffiti, day of event $65+tx. 

Register on or before April 21st and you are automatically entered in the drawing for the STRYKER AR1 ELITE MARKER AND X7PHENOM from Tippmann.


SHERWOOD FOREST – May 5th & 6th, 2018

A long time ago, in a land not so far away, A noble King & his squire set out to fill his court with the bravest, wisest, …. Let us just press fast forward a bit & we’ll rewind it back to the beginning on game day. Ah, here, this looks like a good spot to just jump back in…

As the search for the grail was coming to a close, Ministry officials made the call to step in and arrest the Knights of Camelot for the wrongful death of a famous historian. Mean while, before any of this happened, (most likely right after the original story began) rumors of this holy quest reached the ears of the Spanish Inquisition, (nobody expects them) & they want in on the action. After the bail was posted for the knights by unknown parties, life on the outside has changed.…

(Sorry for the inconvenience, but the person responsible for the narration of our event has just been sacked. A new hire will now take over. Thank you for your patients)

As darkness fell across the lands & the dead arise from the slumbers of hell, bleak was….

(Sorry, sorry, the persons responsible for the new hire have just been sacked and the sacking of the new hire has taken place as well. I’m starting to believe this is all run by Yaks.)

(The person whom has been apologizing to you has now been sacked and has been replaced by a Llama in a suit. This decision came from the board of directors of the Society & Preservation of the European Swallow, where a majority of the share holders moonlight as Free Masons of the Shire for People with no sense of Direction. All of this has been approved by the Ministry of Silly Walks).

Today’s lunch special is spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, baked beans and spam.

Factions for the event are as followed (unless more sackings occur).

Blue/ the Knights of Camelot will be led by Bill “Hindu“ Hinderlider from team SBD.

Red/ the Spanish Inquisition (only because the French are taunting us a 2nd time).

Will be led by Jammie “Worm” Bothwell from team Mutiny.

This event will fall heavily in the Holy Grail verse & will most likely cover all other Monty Python verses, shows, movies, songs and unintelligible ramblings. So without further ado and for your viewing pleasure, here is a picture of a Larch.